I've sat here at the computer trying to think of what I can say to express what I feel. I see his sweet face and everything becomes too real. Today at my doctors appointment I was dialated to a two and 70% efaced. Our sweet little Brigham will be here before we know it! There are so many thoughts that repeat over in my head and so many emotions that I never knew I could feel. I litterally feel like I am being tugged back and forth like a rag doll between two ideas. I feel so uncertain for things that are certainly going to come. I feel unprepared for being a mother even though I already have two children. I can't make sense of my body although I've been living in it for 23 years. I guess you can call me confused. I can't really feel one certain emotion and that in itself is hard for me. I know as time comes I will feel a flood of emotions and one by one feel each of them at their own specific moment. As for things I am certain of...
I have made the move down to the valley. After much debating I told myself I really needed to be here. Now that I know I'm already dilating and thinning I think it was the right move. I know that it doesn't mean he is coming soon, but I also know that it doesn't mean he will go full term. They have me schedualed for an induction on October 26, at 8:30 am if he does't come before then. He is head down and spine up all ready in birthing position. so I have 16 days left and the countdown begins. Joe and I are taking this one day at a time. Thanks to the talks in church on Sunday my outlook for the next few months will be, "Come What May and Love It." I know the Lord is on my side and I know with this all things are possible.
Here we go sweet son of ours...
I can't wait to meet you and hold you in my arms.
I love you today, tomorrow, and always never, ever forget it...
9 comments:
What sweet pictures of your little boy! If you need anything let us know. We're praying for you.
i cant help but have so much love for you guys. i cant wait to see pictures of his sweet face too :) he is already adorable from all the pictures!!
I can't believe we are the same age! You are so strong! & you have so many people rooting you on & so many people praying for your family! & people watching from heaven! He's a lucky little guy! Can't wait to see how cute he is
We will be praying for you guys! He is almost here!!!
"I love you today, tomorrow, and ALWAYS, never, NEVER forget it!" He is just so adorable Chels! I can't wait to meet him. I miss you already! Hang in there sis. Love ya!
What a precious baby boy. I want you to know that you are in our thoughts and prays, even the other night at the dinner table Cooper said the pray and blessed your family. It was one of the sweetest prays he has ever given. I also thought of you when Misti gave her talk on Sunday. If you need anything let us know. Love ya!
Chelsea,
You don't know me, but I have heard of your circumstances and have followed your story best I can. I hope you don't mind me leaving a comment. I have been in your shoes...7 years ago. I remember feeling just as you...confused and not knowing what the future would hold. Turning it over to Heavenly Father is all you can do just like you said. What I can tell you for certainty is that no matter what He decides for your son is that you will feel His presence and that of angels stronger than ever. It will be a very tender and special experience that words can't even describe. I know I don't know you personally, but I know you must be a remarkable mother and whatever the future holds, Heavenly Father trusts you with this sweet spirit and has prepared you for this. I have and will continue to think about and pray for you guys.
My sweet, sweet sister! I am so lucky to have such a strong girl to look up to. You are my baby sister but such a good example to me and my family. You are the epitome of strength and grace. I love you and your family and I know you will get through this what ever it may be! Love You
CHELSEEAA. Alright, so I've been reading your blog off and on for the past few months and EVERYTIME I read it I cry! But not always because I'm sad, a lot of times it's because I feel inspired, and other times because your strength is strengthening my own testimony. You have a way of putting your thoughts into words so well and you are such an amazing mommy. I can't believe we're old enough to even be dealing with stuff like this. I'm so hapy your man is such a stud and makes you feel so happy. Im prayin for you girl. Keep postin, and I'll keep crying. :)
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